You Know You're Addicted to the Internet When.......

You get in the elevator and double-press the button for the floor you want.

Your bookmark takes 15 minutes to scroll from top to bottom.

Your eyeglasses have a web site burned in on them.

All of your friends have an @ in their names.

You can't call your mother...she doesn't have a modem.

You step out of your room and realize that your family has moved and you don't have a clue when it happened.

You find yourself brainstorming for new subjects to search.

You check your e-mail. It says "no new messages." So you check it again.

When not only do you check your e-mail more often than your paper mail, but you
remember your network address faster than your postal one.

You try to sleep, and think ... "http://www.dreams.heaven"

And even your night dreams are in HTML.

You tell the cab driver you live at http://123.elm.street/house/bluetrim.html

You have commandeered your teenager's phone line for the net and even his friends know not to call on his line anymore.

You refuse to go to a vacation spot with no electricity and no phone lines.

You finally do take that vacation, but only after buying a cellular modem and a laptop.

You spend half of the plane trip with your laptop on your lap...and your child in the overhead compartment.

When after fooling around all day with routers etc, you pick up the phone and start dialing an IP number.

All your daydreaming is preoccupied with getting a faster connection to the net:
28.8...ISDN...cable modem...T1...T3.

You tell the kids they can't use the computer because "I've got work to do" and you don't even have a job.

You buy a Captain Kirk chair with a built-in keyboard and mouse.

Your spouse makes a new rule: "The computer cannot come to bed."

You get a tattoo that says, "This body best viewed with Netscape 4.5 or higher."

Your heart races faster and beats irregularly each time you see a new WWW site address in print or on TV, even though you've never had heart problems before.

You turn on your intercom when leaving the room so you can hear if new e-mail arrives.

Your wife drapes a blonde wig over your monitor to remind you of what she looks like.

You code your homework in HTML and give your instructor the URL.

You miss more than five meals a week downloading the latest info you found on the web.


Source: Craig Nansen